If you’re the parent of a teenage girl, then you’re probably wondering, “Where the heck did my little girl go and who is this angry tiny adult in my home!?” Don’t worry – you’re not alone.
Your daughter is going through crazy changes that are throwing her emotions all over the place. She’s going through her first experiences with love, puberty, heartbreaks, friend fights, peer pressure and academic stress. Every little inconvenience feels like the end of the world for her, and that’s why you’ve got to remember to get out of her way when she’s upset, and be there for her when she needs you most. Obviously, there will be some exceptions when it comes to parenting.
Here are some ways to get your teenage daughter to warm up to you when she’s acting her coldest.
- Give her a warm smile whenever she walks into a room (instead of showing disapproval).
- Let her know that she can tell you anything, and you won’t get mad. This will allow trust between the two of you, and she will be less likely to hide things from you.
- Listen to what she tells you, and try to remember it all.
- Ask her about her personal life and not just “how was school?” Ask her about her friends, her classes, her worries, her triumphs, etc.
- Share some stories about when you were in high school. This will remind her that you were her age once, too, and it may help her to remember that you can understand what she’s going through.
- Avoid lecturing her during stressful times. If your daughter is noticeably upset about something, it is not the time to grill her about anything else. Handle one issue at a time, and then bring it up once she’s calmed down.
- Show interest in what she likes. The best way to relate to your daughter is if you adopt her interests. Watch her favorite show with her, listen to the music she likes, read some of the books she’s into. This will give you both something to talk about and bring you closer.
- Take her out for lunch. Offer to take your daughter to her favorite restaurant for lunch. This will give you two a chance to talk about whatever, and she will feel special. Try to give her your undivided attention, and stay off your phones!
- If she’s acting disrespectful towards you, stay patient, and avoid raising your voice. Let her know that disrespect will not slide in your house, but in order to do that, you need to stay respectful, too.
- Remind her that her family loves her and will always accept her.
- Let her know that it’s ok to be herself as long as she’s trying to be her best.
- Tell her that her safety is your number one priority, and she should always contact you in case of an emergency.
Hang in there, moms and dads. Eventually, her hormones will balance out, and she will turn around and thank you for all of those punishments, lectures, lessons, pep talks, and hugs.